You know, these days, it’s hard not to feellike the world is ending. North Korean rockets, rising sea level, and we’ve just entered the sixthseason of Vanderpump Rules, which may be why there’s a newgroup worried about Armageddon. Desi Lydic has more. LYDIC: Doomsday preppers. They’re a nervous infantry of … MAN: Conservative, right-wing patriots. LYDIC: Angry at the radical foundation and arming themselves to the teeth for the apocalypse. It’s time to be prepared. Gentleman 2: We can fight off a tyrannical government. LYDIC: Meaning this chap. I croaked deep into the wilderness to meet Rick Austin, a veteran right-wing prepper who speculates … Hillary Clinton’s runningthe biggest crime syndicate in the world countries. LYDIC: So he’s fortified himself in an off-the-grid compound because … AUSTIN: Doomsday could be only around the corner.( gunshot) LYDIC: And he’s serious, even with his person in role. But now there’s a new type of prepper joining the grades of periphery, anti-government reactionaries. I am a liberal prepper.You can’t trust the governmentwith your liberties. Are you sureyou’re not a conservative? -Yes.-What’s the MSNBC lineup? Go. Rachel Maddow, Chris Matthews, Mika Kazinski. All well and good. This is a real dude, a radical prepper, who’s part of a flourishing movement of millions of liberals proposing for the end of civilization. And we protected his identity because he’s worried … Under Trump, this could end upbecoming a modern civil war. LYDIC: But there can’t be that big certain differences between these two cliques of survivalists, right? Sure the right wing has had a few more years to prep, but I’m sure that they’re mostly on the same side. Liberals are gonna bethe firstly ones to die because the majority of members of’ emare afraid of guns.How countless grease-guns did you buy? I don’t have a gun. Earnestly? -I have a baton.-Yes, you do. 28 and three-quarters inches. -You don’t have to brag.-It slices and chops. So, are you preparingfor the apocalypse, or an anime assembly? Actually, this is absolutely practical. What you need is a katana. That’s the stupidest( bleep) I’ve ever heard of. But why don’t you attract that? Bang! You’re dead. Okay, but you know whatyou’re not record for? The 30 secondswhen you’re gonna be like, -“Whoa! What a cool sword.”-Bang.LYDIC: Luckily, our liberal prepper was very well-trained. I has not been able to trainedwith my katana. -You’re not qualified? -Not at all. Okay. But at least he studied Kung Fu Panda. If you spin aroundlike a tornado, you can suck your foes intowards the blade, and slice them to flecks. So conservatives are definitely more well armed, but prepping is also about plies, right? You need a bug-out bag. That’s right, a camo knapsack full of nutrient, protect and…-Oh. Right.-And this. A vibrator. It’s not a vibrator. Oh, right. Sorry.Personal massager. -This is a lifestraw.-What else you got in there? Cat food. For the felines. The cats are the first thing Iwould abandon in the cataclysm. In all franknes, you might have to eat one. -Seriously? -Mm-hmm. Maybe this guy certainly was prepared. In addition to the bag, he had a fool-proof escape plan. My plan is to hightail itto the west side of the Rockies and satisfy the other peoplewho have the same plan.Yes. Have you talkedto anyone else with this plan? -No. -Shouldn’t partof prepping be finding out if other people have this plan, if it’s dependent on otherpeople having these action plans? Uh, yes, but…talking about your plan is not typicallywhat a prepper would do. You don’t want to, like, go on national TV -and talk about it.-No.( whispers ): You’re on TV now. But Kung Fu Panda isn’t the only liberal prepper. The campaign was catching shell. There’s even a trendy L.A. existence companionship selling $5,000 luxury bug-out bags. But who would buy something like that? Ben Affleck is a client. -Ben Affleck has a bag? -Yeah, Ben Affleck. When Batman has a doomsday bag, you know we’re( bleep ). And this crate had nothing but the absolute inevitabilities. There’s Mast Brother chocolate, caviar, and a champagne koozie. Ooh. Love that.And it comes with the champagne. So after I sold a kidney to a guy called Otter and put 5 G’s, I was eventually ready to show Rick Austin that radicals can be just as prepared for the cataclysm as republicans. You got to be( bleep) me.That’s useless. That’s worthless.That’ll last two minutes. That’s not gonna work.This won’t work. -That’s a piece of( bleep ). -How about this? -Poker. -That is the mostuseless thing I’ve seen. You’re right.I’ll just play online poker. With what? Uh, my phone? AUSTIN: In a doomsday scenario, the phone’s already dead. It’s okay– I was gonnaupgrade it to the 8 regardles. LYDIC: So how would a conservative supplant my badass radical survival pouch? AUSTIN: I can show you how to be established by a sanctuary with really a rainfall poncho.I’m gonna slither down in now. Sorry, how long againdo you have to stay under there? You can stay down here to sleepall night if you wanted to. Cool. Okay, while you stay in there, I’m just gonna stop doingsome prepping.( sound) What was that? -You can live in thisindefinitely. -Yeah? -It’ll exclude you warm, -Will it? -and, uh, safe.-Wow. That’s so cool. LYDIC: Ugh. Partisan prepping is spending. But if the world is ending, can’t both sides at least prep together? As Rick cooked some ramen noodles, I was determined to give it one last shot. Maybe in the apocalypse, there won’t beconservatives and liberals. There’ll simply bepeople that survive. Precisely. And dead liberals. Right. I conclude the…the pates are done. So am I ..
